Fear & A Misquoted Lyric

Photo Credit: @othentikisra

Microphone close-up. A fancier version of my hairbrush.

I came down the stairs, singing at the top of my lungs. Hairbrush in hand. Meaning every single word of Beautiful Day by U2.

It was a beautiful day.

I was in NYC with friends, staying in a swanky brownstone on the Upper East Side. The snow was lightly falling on the ground, my stomach bug was mostly gone, and we were getting ready for a night on the town.

There’s nothing like New Year’s Eve in NYC. 

It’s loud. I seriously wish they’d outlaw those horrendous horns.

It’s messy.

And it’s super entertaining. Like the man, I saw run-leaping down the sidewalk in a tutu.

You read the part where it was snowing, right? Come to think of it, I was more impressed by his attire because of the weather, not because he looked like a lost ballerina using all of Manhatten as his stage. 

But I digress. 

I love this song by U2. There’s something about the very last part of the song that always knocks me in my emotional gut. And living my best life on New Year’s Eve made it even more special. 

To save you from singing through the song or googling it, here are the lyrics: 

What you don't have you don't need it now

What you don't know you can feel it somehow

What you don't have you don't need it now Don't need it now 

Only I was singing it wrong!

Every. Single. Time. 

The first line - totally golden. Got that one. 

It feels liberating. If Bono says I’m exactly where I need to be, then so be it. 

I’ve got everything I need. 

That second line, though.  That one, I changed the lyrics. 

Maybe it says something about me or my internal landscape? 

I thought he said, and the part I sing with the most heartfelt resonance is: 

What you don’t know, you can fear it sometimes.

Right? 

I mean, yeah, it’s true. 

I often fear what I don’t know. 

That’s what made sense to me. And no one ever corrected my version. 

(Any chance I can petition Bono to change those lyrics?)

Sure, I could go into a long discussion about the importance of communication and listening. 

But instead, I want you to notice what comes up for you when you read my version of the lyric - what you don’t know you can fear sometime. 

Fearing the unknown is a real thing. It can lead you to become stuck, avoid change, and spiral into anxiety or depression. 

So, what can you do if you find yourself in this place? (Not missing lyrics, fear). 

First, harness your power of mindfulness and pause. 

Spoiler alert: Usually, the story you make up about the fear is much scarier than the reality. 

Next, take a breath.

I know it sounds trite. Breath is free and underrated. Take a deep breath in and then out. 

Then, observe what’s going on.

What do you fear? What’s coming up for you? What if you looked at it from a known perspective? If you knew what was going to happen next or how to do the thing, what would that look like? How would you feel? 

Are you able to accept this is where you are right now? 

And the last challenge is to lean into the sensation of fear.

Feel it. Notice how it feels in your body. Notice your thoughts. 

Pro tip: Usually, if you’re able to sit with your feelings instead of ignoring them or running from them (cleaning, watching TV, listening to music or a podcast, etc.), they will run through you more quickly and dissipate. 

By the way, I still sing the wrong lyric. After all these years, I just can’t go back to the original line. Sorry, Bono, I like my version better. 

Stay Curious,

Sheila

Sheila Tucker is a licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of Heart Mind & Soul Counseling. She empowers clients who overthink, worry, and experience their fair share of anxiety to become more rooted in peace, ease, and confidence. When not in the office, you'll find her walking her pups or planning her next mountain getaway with her husband.  

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