Why I Ditched New Year’s Resolutions and What I Do Instead
📷 by @timmossholder
The word “Resolutions” staked to a weather-worn fence.
Ever since I can remember, I’ve had an aversion to New Year’s Resolutions.
I don’t like them. I don’t set them.
It typically leads to a confused face and questions.
One year, I spent New Year’s with a small group of friends.
We decided on an at-home hang.
A fire was burning in the fireplace, and per usual, Dick Clark’s Rock’n Eve was playing in the background.
But mostly, there were a lot of spirited conversations.
Then, the topic turned to resolutions.
I cringed.
Apparently, it was noticeable.
I don’t know about you, but this time of year, I am inundated with emails and social media posts about New Year’s resolutions.
I’ll save you the time. I did a quick Google search. Yep! There are countless articles, too.
They’re all similar and usually revolve around setting a SMART goal (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound).
Don’t get me wrong, it’s sound advice.
But I’m not doing it.
Why?
It doesn’t align. It feels pressured.
And seriously, who needs that kind of pressure rolling into a New Year of possibilities?
Then again, I’m not known for doing it because everyone else is.
It’s winter, people.
It’s cold. It gets dark super early. Birds are migrating to warm places. And so are the people (hello, Florida).
This description doesn’t scream “do stuff.”
It tells me to slow down, self-reflect, connect, dream, and plan.
I suppose I’m more like a bear than a budding flower.
Which makes sense. It’s winter!
So, what does this look like?
I journal and write freely about how I’m doing, my hopes, and my dreams. I add meditation and movement, which help with flow and creativity.
I plan outings with friends, cuddle with my husband and dog, and catch up with colleagues.
I also create a loose plan for approaching my hopes and dreams.
But I do it all at a slower pace. One that’s intentional.
Not rushed. Not hurried.
Taking time to tune into what works for me and where I want to go or grow next.
In case you’re wondering.
Yes, I still work and participate in life.
Sitting around the fireplace, we had a different discussion about resolutions.
We discussed the pressure to follow through and the self-shaming or disappointment that inevitably happens around the end of January.
I wouldn’t say I changed anyone’s mind. As one friend pointed out, “It’s tradition!”
I’ll give him that.
What about you?
Do you make New Year’s Resolutions? Or do you have a different approach to the New Year?
***If you’re looking to make a lasting change this year, this post is worth a read.
Cheers,
Sheila
Sheila Tucker is a licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of Heart Mind & Soul Counseling. She empowers clients who overthink, worry, and experience their fair share of anxiety to become more rooted in peace, ease, and confidence. When not in the office, you'll find her walking her pups or planning her next mountain getaway with her husband.
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