The Tug-of-War Between Change and Staying the Same
You’re not the boss of me,” I mumbled under my breath, not wanting to do the thing I told myself I should do. Truth be told, I also utter this phrase when I know I want to change something about myself or my situation, but I don’t.
Or I do, but it’s incredibly short-lived. The difference between me and the 5-year-old is that he does the thing.
It’s a lot like New Year’s resolutions. You resolve to drink more water, go to the gym, eat better, or have date nights with your partner. But you’re running at full speed ahead, and until you’re not, you find yourself returning to your old habits.
Or, in therapy, there’s something that you want to do differently. You want to decrease your anxiety or communicate better with your partner. Only the progress feels slow, or the old habits creep back in, and before long, you feel stuck.
One thing I know that’s true about resolutions, whether therapeutic or New Year: They require some sort of change.
Why I Ditched New Year’s Resolutions and What I Do Instead
I have an aversion to New Year’s Resolutions.
I don’t like them. I don’t set them.
It typically leads to a confused face and questions.
One year I spent New Year’s with a small group of friends. We decided on an at home hang. Honestly, the food rivaled any restaurant in the area. A fire was burning in the fireplace, and per usual, Dick Clark’s Rock’n Eve was playing in the background.
But mostly there was a lot of spirited conversations.
Then the topic turned to resolutions.
I cringed.
Apparently, it was noticeable.
Diving Off The High Dive
You don't realize how high up you really are until your toes are gripping the edge of the board. As you're staring at the tops of the trees, the pool seems so far away. This seemingly simple measure of fun and excitement now takes on a feeling of fear with your heart in your throat. The reality, it only takes one small step to hurl yourself into the deep end. And yet, you're frozen. Too frightened to move forward and equally afraid to admit defeat. What do you do?
Rest and Play: It’s not just for children
All of the cool kids are doing it. Play and rest, that is.
Coloring to Reduce Stress
Researchers – yes, that’s right…this topic has been researched – have discovered that the act of coloring can relieve stress. Coloring activates the part of the brain that stimulates creativity, as well as relaxes the part of the brain responsible for emotions and survival instincts. Hello, reduced anxiety and stress!
Simple ways to include self-care in your daily routine
I mean, think about it: when we’re stressed, almost everything can seem complicated and like a chore. By reducing that weight by just an ounce, we’re setting ourselves up for more favorable returns. But what is self-care? I loosely describe it as an intentional way to meet our mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical needs. That sounds good, right?
Stretching the Body and Mind
Do I work through the discomfort? Do I welcome the negative voices, knowing they only want to keep me from harm, not from accomplishment? Or do I buy into the moment’s uncomfortableness and believe the negative chatter or stop moving forward? What about you? Do you work through the discomfort?